Treat others the way you want to be treated is good advice.
But when it comes to communication, there may be an even better version:
Treat others the way they need to be treated.
That idea came through clearly in my conversation with Will Giangrande on Communicast. Will is a certified facilitator for Take Flight Learning, where he helps organizations improve workplace culture by helping people understand themselves and others more effectively.
In the episode, we discussed personality styles, communication preferences, preparation, channel choice, and how adapting your message can improve workplace relationships.
Great Communication Is Not One-Size-Fits-All
Many professionals communicate based on their own preferences.
If they like detail, they give detail. If they prefer quick updates, they keep things short. If they are comfortable with direct feedback, they assume others will appreciate the same approach. If they like email, they use email for almost everything.
But effective communication is not only about your preferred style.
It is about what the other person needs in order to understand, engage, and respond.
That does not mean becoming someone you are not.
It means paying attention to the person in front of you and making thoughtful adjustments so the message is more likely to land.
Adaptability Is a Communication Skill
One of the strongest themes from the conversation was adaptability.
People have different communication styles, needs, and expectations. Some want the point quickly. Some want context. Some want time to process. Some want a conversation. Some want written details they can review later.
Strong communicators notice those differences and adjust.
They adapt:
- The amount of detail
- The pace of the conversation
- The level of directness
- The examples they use
- The communication channel
- The follow-up needed
- The tone and delivery style
Adaptability does not weaken your message. It makes your message easier for the other person to receive.
Personality Styles Can Help You Communicate Better
Personality style frameworks can be useful when they help people better understand differences in communication preferences.
The goal is not to label people or put them into boxes.
The goal is to become more aware of what different people may need from an interaction.
For example, some people may prefer fast, direct, results-oriented communication. Others may prefer more relationship-building, context, and discussion. Some may want energy and brainstorming. Others may want calm, careful thinking and time to reflect.
When you recognize these differences, you can adjust your approach.
If someone wants the point quickly, you may lead with the recommendation. If someone needs context, you may explain the background first. If someone values relationship, you may spend more time connecting before moving into the task.
The message may be the same, but the delivery should be shaped around the person receiving it.
You Are Usually a Blend of Styles
Another important point from the episode was that most people are not only one thing.
Personality assessments can be useful, but they should not become rigid labels.
People are often a blend of styles. They may lean more strongly in one direction, but they can still show characteristics of other styles depending on the situation, relationship, pressure level, or role.
That matters because effective communication requires observation, not assumption.
Do not assume you know exactly how someone wants to communicate based on one label or one interaction.
Watch. Listen. Ask. Adjust.
Listen With Your Ears and Your Eyes
One of the practical takeaways from the conversation was the idea that strong communicators listen with both their ears and their eyes.
What someone says matters.
But so does what you observe.
Body language, facial expressions, pace, tone, energy, movement, eye contact, and silence can all provide useful clues about how someone prefers to communicate.
For example, someone who moves quickly, speaks directly, and gets right to the point may not want a long, highly detailed setup. Someone who asks many questions may need more context before making a decision. Someone who pauses often may be processing and may need space before responding.
These cues can help you understand how the other person wants to be interacted with and communicated with.
For related guidance, read about how to learn and practice body language.
Choosing the Right Communication Channel Matters
Another valuable part of the episode focused on communication channels.
Today, professionals have more ways to communicate than ever.
Email. Text. Chat. Phone. Video. In-person meetings. Collaboration tools. Voice notes. Formal letters. Shared documents.
That flexibility is useful, but it can also create more opportunities for miscommunication.
Not every message belongs in every channel.
Some people text when they should call. Some call when they should meet in person. Some send long, complicated messages in a channel that is better suited for quick updates.
Great communicators recognize which situation calls for which mode of communication.
When to Use Different Communication Channels
Choosing the right channel depends on the message, the relationship, the urgency, and the emotional weight of the situation.
Here are a few practical guidelines:
- Use chat or text for quick updates, simple confirmations, or low-risk questions.
- Use email when the message needs documentation, detail, or a record people can reference later.
- Use phone or video when the issue needs discussion, nuance, or faster back-and-forth.
- Meet in person when the conversation is sensitive, high-stakes, relationship-driven, or emotionally important.
- Use a formal note or letter when thoughtfulness, permanence, or personal meaning matters.
The right channel can make the same message feel clearer, more respectful, and more appropriate.
Preparation Helps You Adapt
Adaptability does not happen only in the moment.
It also comes from preparation.
Before an important conversation, presentation, or meeting, think about the person or audience you are communicating with.
Ask yourself:
- What do they care about?
- How do they usually communicate?
- Do they prefer detail or brevity?
- Do they need time to process?
- What channel is most appropriate?
- What concerns might they have?
- What will help them understand the message?
Preparation gives you a better chance of communicating in a way that meets the other person’s needs.
Adapting Does Not Mean Being Inauthentic
Some people resist adapting their communication style because they worry it feels fake.
But adapting is not the same as pretending.
You can stay true to yourself while still changing your pace, level of detail, tone, or delivery style to better match the moment.
For example, if your natural style is warm and conversational but you are meeting with someone who prefers direct, fast-moving communication, you do not need to abandon your personality. You may simply need to lead with the point, tighten the background, and make the next step clear.
That is not inauthentic.
That is audience awareness.
Adaptation Is Especially Important in Leadership
Leaders communicate with many different people: executives, peers, direct reports, clients, partners, and cross-functional teams.
Each audience may need something different.
A leader who uses the exact same communication style with everyone may unintentionally create confusion or friction.
Some team members may need encouragement. Others may need direct expectations. Some may need context. Others may need autonomy. Some may need conversation. Others may need written follow-up.
Strong leaders learn to adapt while keeping the message clear and consistent.
That balance helps build trust.
Adaptation Is Also Critical in Presentations
The same principle applies when presenting.
A presentation to executives should not sound the same as a presentation to a project team. A customer presentation should not be built the same way as an internal update. A technical audience may need depth, while a broader business audience may need simplicity and implications.
Before presenting, ask:
- Who is this audience?
- What do they need first?
- What style of communication will help them engage?
- What concerns are they likely to have?
- What level of detail will support understanding?
- What action or decision should follow?
Communispond’s Executive Presentation Skills® program helps professionals adapt presentations to audience needs, organize messages clearly, and communicate with confidence and impact.
How to Adapt Your Communication Style
Use this simple framework before your next important interaction:
- Observe. Pay attention to pace, tone, energy, questions, and body language.
- Listen. Notice what matters most to the other person.
- Ask. Clarify preferences, concerns, and expectations when appropriate.
- Choose the right channel. Match the message to the medium.
- Adjust the delivery. Adapt pace, detail, tone, and structure.
- Confirm understanding. Make sure the message landed as intended.
- Follow up. Use the format that best supports the next step.
These habits help communication feel more relevant and respectful.
Final Thought
Great communication is not only about saying things clearly.
It is about saying them in a way the other person can receive, understand, and use.
That means paying attention to personality styles, communication preferences, nonverbal cues, channel choice, and the needs of the moment.
Treating others the way they need to be treated is not just good manners.
It is a powerful communication skill.
Connect with Will Giangrande on LinkedIn, and explore more episodes of Communicast for conversations on leadership, communication, and influence.
